Paul Michael Glaser: I'm at peace now after rage at my wife and son being killed by AIDS

Paul Michael Glaser: I'm at peace now after rage at my wife and son being killed by AIDS

As a hormonal teenager with the world’s biggest crush I spent four years staring at pictures of screen heart-throb Paul Michael Glaser.

Like millions of fans I watched every episode of 70s US cop show Starsky and Hutch, but my devotion to the dark-haired half of the dreamboat duo knew no bounds… I even wore a Starsky cardie knitted by my long-suffering mum.

And, while three decades may have passed, I’m convinced I’ll recognise Paul instantly when he arrives for our interview. So who, I wonder, is the ageing hippy with the bushy beard and long greying hair approaching me from across the park?

Then I notice that distinctive swagger. It’s the gait of a man who should be walking to his red and white striped Ford Torino with a 9mm Smith and Wesson in his ankle holster ready to patrol the streets of California.

But Paul, now 70, is actually heading to a rehea rsal studio in West London to prepare for the lead role in a new stage production of musical Fiddler on the Roof â€" hence the beard.

And as we chat it soon becomes clear that the startling physical transformation of Starsky into Tevye is nothing compared to the changes in his personal and ­spiritual life.

For 20 years ago he thought his life was over after his teacher wife Elizabeth and daughter Ariel died from Aids and his son Jake was left infected by HIV.

Paul Michael Glaser with his late wife Elizabeth and their daughter Ariel

 

He says: “I was full of rage, anger and guilt that I couldn’t do anything to stop this. I’d ask, ‘Why me? Why Me?’ But the only answer to that question was, ‘Why not me?’ In my darkest moments I ­probably thought about ending it.

“But nothing made sense, even that. I liken it to being a soldier in Vietnam. Somehow you put one foot in front of the other and you get through it.”

Paul and Elizabeth, had been married a year when, in 1981, she was given an HIV infected blood transfusion while giving birth to Ariel.

She passed the virus on through breast feeding and three years later infected their second child, Jake, in the womb.

The family only discovered the tragedy when Ariel fell ill with a mystery virus at four and was diagnosed with Aids.

Paul remained clear but ignorance and fear of Aids then meant even their closest friends cut them off.

When Ariel died the Glasers bravely decided to go public. Elizabeth wrote a h eart-rending book and founded the Paediatric Aids Foundation which has raised millions for research and led to the virtual eradication of mother-to-child HIV infection in the US.

Princess Diana said Elizabeth’s courage had sparked her own work for Aids charities in Britain and she visited the Glasers at their home in Massachusetts.

Paul Michael Glaser (left) in the Fiddler on the Roof movie

 

After his wife’s death Paul continued to campaign and threw himself into work.

But he admits he fought a long and painful journey to come to terms with his grief. He was repeatedly approached to write his autobiography but found it impossible to revisit those dark days.

But he has now written and self-published a fantasy novel called Chrystallia and the Source of Light which he calls “a metaphorical autobiography”.

Paul says: “It’s about a teenage girl and her nine-year-old brother whose mom is dying, on a journey in an ­underground world where everyone and everything is made of crystals and minerals, searching for the source of light.”

Now, I normally switch off when a Hollywood star starts talking crystals, energy and rebirth… especially if they’re wearing a T-shirt with the slogan “Isness Is”. But Paul has come through a lot more than your average LA luvvie, and he does have a very genuine sense of peace.

He says: “ I want to share what I’ve learned about loss and helplessness and our fear that we can do nothing to prevent death or know what comes after it.

“Acknowledging that fear taught me to be compassionate to myself. And, I hope, more compassionate to others.”

Paul does not believe he will be reunited with his beloved Ariel and Elizabeth in an afterlife but says he feels them with him always.

Starsky Hutch, August 1989

He adds: “It’s just an understanding that they are inside me. I still say ‘Hi’ and tell them I love them.”

Jake, 28, is a consultant to his mother’s foundation. He remained fit and well but last year had a health scare that brought the family nightmare back into focus.

Paul says: “I have a rare gene that resists the HIV virus which is why I never got infected. Jake inherited that gene from me and it gave him resistance to Aids.

“But from about 25 on it seems you lose that resistance. So, about a year ago Jake had a ‘come to Jesus moment’ where the doctors said, ‘OK, you either take this medicine or you are going to die.’ So he did, and he came through with flying colours. He’s in good health.”

Paul also has a daughter Zoe, 15, from his second marriage to Tracy Barone. They divorced in 2007. In the 70s he had female fans throwing themselves at him. But he says he is now happily single. “I was ne ver ­comfortable with ­celebrity,” he adds with a twinkle in his still-piercing blue eyes.

“I have never been really successful in a relationship even with ­Elizabeth. You hope to grow into a relationship, but then the journey with HIV made things different. I am far better at being alone now.”

Paul, who remains close pals with Hutch actor David Soul, used to hate being asked about the show.

Paul Michael Glaser and David Soul of Starsky and Hutch

 

He went on to direct movies such as The Running Man with Arnold Schwarzenegger and TV’s Miami Vice.

In his 60s, Paul discovered the ­lucrative UK panto circuit playing Captain Hook in Peter Pan and Abanazar in Aladdin. But in 2006, he and David agreed to appear in cameo roles in the Starsky and Hutch movie, starring Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson, Paul says: “It finally dawned on me I was always going to be ­associated with the series and I made peace with that.”

He will begin a seven-month UK tour of Fiddler on the Roof, directed and ­choreographed by Strictly judge Craig Revel Horwood. The 1971 film about a Jewish family in Tsarist Russia won three Oscars. It made a star of Israeli actor Topol who played Tevye, the poor milkman trying to marry off five daughters. It also featured a young Paul as one of their suitors, Perchick.

He says. “It celebrates the spirit of mankind with those great numbers like If I Were a Rich Man.”

So is Paul still a rich man at 70? “Not in monetary terms,” he says. “I’ve packed up my apartment, put everything in storage and sold my car so I could do this tour. I said, ‘I’m gonna toss the deck of cards in the air and see how they fall’. How often in life do you get a chance like that?

“Losing my wife and daughter made me very different and I am fortunate that I was able to learn from it. I feel more at peace with myself than ever, so I guess I am a rich man.”

Fiddler on the Roof tour starts Sept 5. Venues: fiddlerontheroof.co.uk.